From MissAyalah to New Moon Nadine

The Scared Edge: Hearing the Call to Change

There's a moment in every transformation that feels like standing at the edge of a cliff. Your body is involuntarily shaking, your breathing becomes shallow, and your heart knows it's time to leap. But your mind hasn't gotten the memo yet, in fact, it urges you to stop, to stay put, that it's unsafe to leave the comfort of what you already know.

I've become intimately familiar with these moments – moving to Las Vegas solo at 22, leaving a cushy consulting job without a backup plan, and now, perhaps the most vulnerable leap yet: saying goodbye to MissAyalah, the gaming/online persona I've embodied for the past two decades.

Some call this difficult phase of transformation a dark night of the soul. Others dismiss it as a mid-life crisis. But I've come to recognize these moments as New Moons in my life – those sacred dark spaces where what's next hasn't yet revealed itself, but change is stirring just beneath the surface.

The Path of Transformation

Each transition demanded its own courage. Whether leaving behind everything I knew in Southern California for a new life in Las Vegas, or walking away from a comfortable consulting position because my soul yearned for something more fulfilling, these leap of faith changes were never for the faint of heart.

But beneath the apparent spontaneity of these leaps lay a deeper wisdom: sometimes we need to be cracked open to let our True Self shine through.

As MissAyalah, I built a thriving community, found my voice, and began my spiritual journey. Yet like a butterfly emerging from its chrysalis, I've outgrown this identity - not just the name, but the energy and signature it carries.

The Birth of a Name

The name "New Moon Nadine" came to me like all true things do – unexpectedly, in the steam of a shower, on the New Moon of November 1st. For years, I had searched for the perfect new identity. I scoured baby name websites, drew inspiration from my beloved Night Elves of World of Warcraft, and even asked my dreams for guidance. Some might find it strange to be paralyzed by something as simple as a name, but to me, names hold power. They carry vibration, intention, and some even say it can determine the person's destiny.

I tried on different variations like NadineAyalah, ForceofNadine, and EnchantressNadine. They were beautiful, but they felt like they belonged to someone else. But New Moon Nadine? It resonated in my bones.

A Lesson from the Moon

As a teenager, I lived in an attic room with a sky window - some of you might remember it from my early Twitch streams.

Every night, the Moon was my last companion before sleep. On New Moon nights, when the sky was at its darkest, I would close my eyes and trust in the inevitable return of the Moon's comforting, peaceful glow. Now, decades later, I understand why this name feels like coming home.

The New Moon represents that sacred darkness where all possibilities live. It's the space where we dare to plant seeds of intention, trusting they will grow as the Moon waxes toward fullness. It's where I've done some of my deepest work, both personally and with others – holding space in times of confusion, doubt, and grief, knowing that clarity will come with time, just as the Moon's light gradually returns to illuminate our path.

This name, New Moon Nadine, is more than just a rebrand. It's a declaration of purpose. It honors both the darkness where transformation begins and the gradual journey toward light. It acknowledges that we, like the Moon, are cyclical beings – constantly moving through phases of hiding and revealing, of letting go and becoming.

A New Chapter Begins

To my gaming community who has known me as MissAyalah – thank you. You've been witness to and part of my evolution. On many occasions, you saved me from loneliness, from deep depression. I didn't feel like I belonged anywhere, yet somehow, we found each other on Twitch, and created a space where it was safe enough to let go of life's worries for a little while. We played games, shared genuine laughter, tears, and heart-warming stories together. The community-building skills, the ability to hold space for others, the courage to be seen – these gifts I learned with you will continue to serve in this new chapter.

To those who first knew me as MissAyalah in the spiritual community - your support means the world to me. You've taught me something incredible: that I don't need to be perfect to help others and make a difference. Whether you joined my tarot readings on TikTok live, held a circle together during in-person events, or sat down for a personal reading with me, your trust has been a gift. You've helped ignite something within me - not just my own healing journey, but also my passion for walking alongside others on their paths of growth and healing.

And to those who resonate with this journey of returning to self – whether you're standing at your own sacred edge or navigating through a dark night of the soul – know that you're not alone. Like the New Moon, our moments of greatest darkness often precede our most powerful transformations.

This isn't an ending but a becoming. As New Moon Nadine, I step forward to serve in an expanded way, holding space for others navigating their own cycles of transformation. Because we all deserve the chance to come home to ourselves, to remember who we were before the world told us who to be, and to shine our unique light into the world.

The Moon taught me that darkness is not the opposite of light – it's where light is born. And sometimes, the most powerful thing we can do is honor the darkness, plant our dreams in its fertile soil, and trust in the inevitability of our own becoming.

There will be room for all phases of me, just like there is room for all phases of the Moon. If that is true, then it is also true that there is more than enough room for all phases of YOU – and it is my hope and prayer that you exercise that right to contract, expand, and evolve.

What's New & What's Next

Let me share openly where this journey is headed - no filters, just honest updates about what I'm working on:

• Gaming meets spirituality: Starting December 6, 2024, I'll be streaming the early access beta of Path of Exile 2 on Twitch
• Weekly connection: Join me for regular tarot readings on TikTok Live, likely every Tuesday or Thursday from 4-6 PM Pacific Time
• Service evolution: Updating my tarot reading services and pricing structure to better serve your needs
• Community growth: Creating both free and paid membership spaces to support you on your personal and spiritual transformation journey

A Heartfelt Invitation - Special Offer for Past Clients

Has our tarot session helped you gain clarity or make positive changes in your life? I'd love to hear your story. By sharing your experience on my new website, you can help others understand what to expect and find the courage to begin their own journey.

As a thank you for your testimonial, you'll receive a complimentary 30-minute tarot reading with me online.

Ready to share? Send your testimonial here!

Link: https://forms.gle/16eDoBvqx5W4K9NN9

Thank you for being part of this journey. I'm excited to share more updates as these plans unfold - whether you're here for gaming, tarot & spirituality, or all of the things including what's in between, there's so much magick ahead.

With gratitude for all phases of the journey,
New Moon Nadine 🌑✨